3 Ways to Strengthen Your Relationship

I find it very fitting (and completely coincidental) that this post is coming to you on Valentine's Day. This is my final post in my routine mini--series (you check out my morning routine here and my evening routine here) and I believe it is the most important one.

Jimmy and I have been married for just over a year and a half, so we are basically marriage experts (#notevenclose). But, we have learned a few things that I believe have made a huge difference in helping us navigate the pitfalls of the first year (or two) of marriage.

This simple 3-step routine that I'm going to share with you has brought Jimmy and I closer together and strengthened our marriage in innumerable ways:

1- Read Scriptures/Pray Together

We recently switched from reading our scriptures in bed to reading right after dinner because we felt like we weren't getting much out of it because we were usually so tired that it was more like "lets do this to get it over with" as opposed to "lets read and learn from the scriptures together". We also started using this study guide to help us get a little more out of it (mostly me, because doodling isn't really Jimmy's thing, but it does lead us to more discussions).

After reading scriptures, finishing off our evening, and being completely ready for bed, we then kneel (usually on the bed, and, not gonna lie, I am usually doing some kind of kneeling/laying on my side hybrid) and pray together. I believe that this is so very important for couples to do. I love listening to Jimmy pray! It also helps us think about what we are thankful for in our life, what our families and friends might be needing prayers for, and what we need for each other and in our marriage.

2- "What was the best part of your day?"

We ask each other this question every. single. night. (or at least almost every. single. night. we aren't perfect, haha). We started doing this like the week or two after we got married and I'm not entirely sure how it got started, but I'm so grateful that it did. I love this question because it gives us a chance to review our days with each other and then focus on the positive.

3- One final question: "What is one thing I can do for you tomorrow?"

Fact: serving someone is the best way to love them.

This question is pretty self-explanatory, but oh so very important. We ask each other for one thing they can do for us the following day. These things range from "remember to take the garbage out" and "make sure I get up on time" to "schedule this appointment" or simply, "can we watch an episode of LOST?". Sometimes it is hard to know what your spouse needs or how to serve them, but asking this question helps eliminate that issue and gives you a very direct way to show your spouse some daily love.

We go through this routine basically every night and I feel like it has helped us grow closer together as a couple. Love happens in a relationship when you make time and space for it. It is easy to get caught up in our own busy lives and forget that our spouse has needs that can really only be met through us. It is worth the 20 minutes of your time to come together with your spouse and check-in with them; ask about their day, spend some time in prayer and scripture, and SERVE THEM. I truly believe that if you start doing a daily routine with your spouse, your relationship will improve.